Thursday, February 26, 2015

and 2015's most awkward photo award goes to...

Generally, I'm not one for gossip but this is a fantastic study in body language.

Missed yesterday's update because of family moving shenanigan's but I'll try and get something out soon-ish.

Monday, February 23, 2015

The 100 Season Two Episode Twelve Recap

The 100 Season Two Episode Twelve: Rubicon

Things are heating up, and taking forever - seeing how I think the writer's are stretching out the conflict with Mt. Weather until the very last episode. And if this is like last season then there is only one more episode left and I'll be left with trying to figure out what to recap next. Ideas?

Anyway, we start off this episode with M.W. Guard RUNNING!! RUN, MISTER GUARD, RUUUNN - your oxygen is about to run out and you'll be killed by the radiation!! Ohhhh, so close but so far! Blondie is playing a mean game with him, but juuust as Mr. Guard starts to implode guess who arrives to save the day!

Why it's the Fop, WITHOUT A SPACESUIT!! What does this mean!? The 48's blood is workinggg!!! THE WORLD WILL BE OUUUURRSS, HAHAHAHAHA!!!

By now the Norman Rockwell assholes aren't even pretending to be cordial about wanting the 48's bone marrow, they just corral them like guinea pigs and go THAT ONE, GIVE ME THAT ONE. They don't even bother TRYING to save them - now they are killing the 48 outright.

Blondie is fretting, Bellamy hasn't checked in yet, and she has her own pet homicidal Grounder to follow her like a shadow and growl when Idiot Overlord lays a hand on her. Doc Mama and Blondie are still butting heads, as Doc Mama refuses to let her baby grow up and realize that Blondie is heading towards the path of bloodthirsty tyrant warlord.

Doc Mama and Idiot Overlord muse on how fast kids grow up these days when Doc Mama produces the Dear John letter the previous Evil Overlord left. He adds, 'it's cool, I'm totes coming back to save you once my cult of crazies have found the promise land'. Ooookay.

Speaking of our Evil Overlord...

Like something straight out of the bible the cult of crazies are wandering the desert of the 'dead zone' (was that what it was called? I can't even remember) when they happen upon a friendly native who goes MY CART!! YOU CAN'T HAVE MY CART!!! Aw, a new crazy to add to the cult. 'If you pull MY CART I will take you to the City of Lights'. Sounds legit.

This is Bel in an air duct, making enough noise to wake the dead but somehow NOBODY hears him thumping around in there like a drunken circus bear. This is Clarke and Raven listening through an earpiece in Bel's head to everything that's going on. What is that noise? Why an electric drill, ripping out the bone marrow of some poor hapless DEAD 48 teen. Let's spy on the evil league of evil scientists.

Our Mt. Weather Guard has survived. WOW, IT SURE WAS GREAT OF YOU TO SAVE ME, SIR. Ho ho ho, not a problem my good man. Now what was it those silly Grounder people told you? Never mind! It doesn't matter because I'M GOING TO NUKE THEIR ASSES OFF, BECAUSE THEY ARE CONVENIENTLY HAVING A GROUNDER LEADER SECRET MEETING THAT ISN'T SO SECRET. Did you get that Bellamy/Blondie?

Blondie to the rescue! Even as she lies to Bel about his sister being at the meeting. Blondie is falling down a deep dark rabbit hole of deceit and Intrigue that is going to bite her on the ass.

The crazy cart lady makes a friend in the Hyena as they pull her cart. Also, she has flipper hands, which is why she wears mittens in the desert.

Bellamy is totally rocking his role as undercover agent in this episode. He gets major intel on the bombing and now he is in the guard duty that is hauling away the 48. He gets to Jasper, pins him against a wall and goes, 'Japser, it's me! Here take this gun and get ready to make a break for it!'

THEN he gets into the Old Prez's suite for some more Intrigue. Bellamy you rock.

Blondie makes it to the Leader Summit and....rescues...no one?

Uh, hm. She goes, 'HA HA EVERYTHING IS FINE, CARRY ON EVERYONE, NOTHING SUSPICIOUS HERE' then runs straight to Queenie screaming THE SKY IS FALLING, THE SKY IS FALLING!!

And our leaders LEAP TO THE RES- do nothing as Queenie says RUN AWAAAYY, RUN AWAAYYY!!!

I guess the thought process is; if they alert the camp (with all the major leaders and factions in the area, so KIND OF important people that could win the war) Mt. Weather will realize they have a mole and will sniff Bellamy out, losing the war in the process? Although... well, anyway.

So Queenie is all for letting everybody die. AND CLARKE GOES ALONG WITH IT.

Octavia conveniently wanders off into the forest... and finds Lincoln. But not Zombie-Lincoln, a whiny-ass Lincoln who thinks Bellamy has been betrayed by him, when Bel ended up right where he needed to be so everything is fine. Octavia smacks Lincoln, which seems to jar him out of chemical dependency and self-loathing.

The Fop is getting ready to bomb the shit out of the summit.

Blondie sees Doc Mama enter the camp and goes OH HELL NO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, RUN AWAAAYYY!!!

Then BOOM. The camp gets exploded.

We have a MAJOR falling out between Doc Mama and Blondie. We're going to ignore the fact that Doc Mama shoved her own husband out an air-lock for the moment and focus on Blondie not warning everyone. This is actually a pretty sticky situation - what would have happened if she HAD warned them and gave away Bel's presence? It's not a guarantee that he would have been found, and it IS his role to free the 48 AND the Grounders and cause general chaos inside Mt. Weather, which would have pretty much given away his presence anyhow. I think he would have been fine, even if he had been found out.

Because, thinking logically, letting your major players in a war die, effectively ENDS the war. You take out the ring-leaders the rabble have no one to rally behind. So it was actually pretty fucking stupid NOT to get at least the leaders out of harm's way.

Well, speaking of chaos - Jasper is rallying the er, 42? for a Last Stand against the superbly evil lady scientist and the guards of Mt. Weather. And fails miserably and makes himself a target (why didn't he shoot the lady doctor? I have NEVER wanted to kick someone's ass so much, as I wanted to kick her ass) ALL IS LOST - except Bel comes through via the help of Old Prez by letting a breach happen, letting in radiated outside air.

The guards melt, and evil lady doctor tries to crawl away into an elevator. OH NO YOU DON'T. Japser and Co. pull a Children of the Corn moment and watch her self-combust. I'm MEEELTING, MEELLLTTINNNGG, WHAT A WORLD WHAT A WORLD. Most satisfying.

Remember Cart Lady and her Cart that she's having Evil Overlord and Co. cart through a vast desert for REASONS? It's a trap. Duh. Her buddy on the horse has a freaking RPG (WHERE do you get that kind of tech. SERIOUSLY!?!) and says PUT EVERYTHING YOU OWN ON THE CART, SUCKERS!!

Our Crazy Cultists now have nothing, not even water. What to do. LET'S WANDER FURTHER INTO THE DESERT TOWARDS CERTAIN DEATH. FAITH WILL GIVE US SHELTER AND WATER!! They are SO going to die.

Fop son confronts the old Prez and whines at him, while the Old Prez says, YOU SUCK. SERIOUSLY, YOU SUCK.

And now we see the aftermath of the bombing which is kinda like the apocalypse all over again. Well, Octavia and Lincoln are alive, and I guess that's all that matters.

Monday, February 16, 2015

The 100 Season Two Episode Eleven Recap

The 100 Season Two Episode Eleven: Coup De Grace

Last time we left off with our emerging hard-core leader mode Blondie who sent Bel to Mt. Weather, not knowing the plan to infiltrate went more or less sideways as he was captured for 'harvesting'. What does harvesting include?

A really rough shower, I guess. Well, given the constant grubby state of everyone I'd imagine this is the first time water and a scrub brush has touched him since he landed on Earth. I ... guess? that's supposed to be blood water dripping through the grates but I don't see any wounds so just... Drama for the sake of Drama?

Meanwhile Jasper is having a full meltdown; this is probably the first time in his life he's been without Monty and he's been missing for two days. Cleaning girl chides him not to do anything crazy, so you know what that means. Time to do something crazy.

Blondie rides onto glory! And an ambush/assassination attempt. (Also I'd like to point out that Doc Mama, alarmingly, scoops up some water from a puddle for her to drink, all the while I was sitting there going uhhh NO. NO NO NO, you don't drink water from puddles!!! Only if you have a mad desire for tapeworm and God knows what other bacterial disease. Clearly, the writers have never been in the outdoors before.)

As per the status quo, RIGHT BEFORE Blondie is head shot-ed A LONE ARROW FLIES INTO THE ASSASSINS NECK, leaving his Mt. Weather buddy flailing as Grounders convene upon him! Octavia has been taking her tiny-angry-warrior training seriously and manages to kick the crap out of him and neaaaarly cut his throat before Blondie arrives just in time to say, 'yea, duh, we need intel dumbasses, don't kill him'

This is Bel in a cage, wearing a diaper. Also we have more people hanging from their heels (and okay, I'm going to drop some more realism on you; the body was not designed to be upside down for long periods of time. It can eventually kill you - your heart has a hard time circulating blood, blood will flow into the lungs and head risking a brain stroke. Don't do this at home kids, for long periods of time as it's incredibly dangerous) so given the fact that Mt. Weather is supposed to be all intellectual/sciencey/smarty pants, I don't know WHY they are hanging people from their heels. I assumed it was to get all the blood out, buuut... just hooking up the IV and letting the heart do the rest works just as easily without hauling a 100 + pounds onto that little contraption. In conclusion, REASONS OF DRAMA.

Bel makes a friend who spits on him and hisses SKYPERSSSOONNNNN. awww, how cute.

Jasper is doing Crazy Things and confronts the President of the Normal Rockwell Club. Ohhh diggity, Jasper's got the crazy eyes going on and he demands to know where his one true love Monty is

aaand pulls a sword on the Pres. when he doesn't get the answer he likes

But the Pres didn't get to BE Pres without having some mad moves, so he turns the blade on Jasper BUT HOLY CRAP he's a good guy!?! He's going to spring Monty and help Jasper!!

Back at the Arc everybody is arguing about the best way to get info from the Mt. Weather dude (who is being purposely obtuse and non-helpful). Scary-ass leader of the Grounders hisses at Blondie 'one of our warrior dies while his capture livessss??!!' and holy CRAP can you be that stupid? Set aside homicidal rage for a moment and please realize that you have someone who has all the information you need about how Mt. Weather security works. It's called INTEL, and you are going to need it. You can knit scarves out of his sinews AFTER he gives you information.

The scary-ass co-leader is all for carving him up like a Thanksgiving turkey but Idiot Overlord and Doc Mama are all like, nawww let's cuddle him into submission.

Scary-ass co-leader hilariously says 'YOU PEOPLE ARE SO WEAK' before storming off, presumably to slaughter small animals with her teeth.

Our theme of Doc Mama being a little too motherly continues and she puts Blondie down and essentially says 'MY BABY, GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM AND LET THE GROWN UPS TALK'. This does not go over well with Blondie, who takes it out on Raven.

Bel is still trying to manhandle a steel cage with only the power of grit, managing to do... nothing at all. He then is chosen to do the hanging thing, while his blood goes to one of the Mt. Weather Norman Rockwell people.

But what's this? Cleaning Girl is doing Intrigue and comes across Bel! He's saved! He plays dead and the guard lets him down only to get kicked in the face for his trouble. Scuffle, scuffle BITE scuffle and the guard is dead, while Bel takes his clothes.

Cleaning Girl is in for it now, she has chosen a side and it ain't the Normal Rockwell's. Ain't love grand? Jasper better not screw this up.

The Pres to the rescue! Monty and Jasper have an adorable reunion and evil lady doctor is sent to the brig. The Pres moves on to take down his treacherous son.

We get a falling out between Slightly Corrupt Father and Really Damned Corrupt son who basically goes, 'it's YOUR fault I torture people!'. Yup, it's a mutiny; evil Fop is now the new President while the old one is sent to the brig. The Norman Rockwell people reaaaaally want to get out of the hole in the ground.

Idiot Overlord, meanwhile, is still trying the Love and Peace interrogation method, but I think the Mt. Weather dude is just vaguely amused by the whining and 'but we saaaaaved you!'

Blondie finds out that the draining of the 48 has already begun, and moves to eviscerate Mt. Weather dude but is stopped by the Adults again. Silly adults.

Her and Raven take out their frustrations on each other when - BEL! You're alive and found a radio!! Plan take Mt. Weather from the inside is a go! Even though is coincides with Fop Pres taking over putting Mt. Weather on lockdown JUST AS BEL FINDS HIS FRIENDS, DENIED!!

Team Blondie - martial the troops! For whatever weird reason (blood and glory, probably) scary-ass co-leader allows Blondie to take the lead, springing Mt. Weather dude and marching him right up to the front gate where Idiot Overlord and Doc Mama are waiting.

Doc Mama puts on her Disapproving look and Blondie says, SHUDDUP, I'M IN CHARGE, GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY. ohhhh, SNAP - Mother/Daughter face-off! Hopefully Doc Mama realizes that Blondie ain't no little kid anymore because she stands down.

Blondie sends the guard home with a message and a little bit of deceit; WE'RE COMING FOR YOUUUUUUU and I have, like, WAY MORE GROUNDERS than you think I have!

Run along now.

Now it's all down to Bellamy surviving long enough to open the way for attack AND free the imprisoned Grounders (who don't realize they have an alliance, and have been caged for God knows how long, and probably have muscle atrophy and are weak, but SCREW REALISM, GO SKYPEOPLE/GROUNDER ALLIANCE!!)

Let's leave off this episode with sad and hilarious picture of poor Old Pres, chilling in his room.

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Book Review: Something From the Nightside, Simon R. Green

Let's preface this with; the review is only my opinion and does not mean anything. It's just what I took away from this book and is a reflection of my personal experiences and beliefs. Because I don't like it and I'm going to expand on WHY I don't like it. But first let's do some pros and cons, IN THE NIGHTSIDE.

PROS:

There is fantastic imagination in this book. There is a great vibrancy of places and characters that I quite enjoyed. As a quick read, it works. It's not taxing, its not heavy, its fast and doesn't dwell on things and you can read it in a few hours, IN THE NIGHTSIDE.

CONS:

I have a theory and goes like this: the vast majority of male authors can't write women worth shit. It's the sad product of a sexist culture that nobody has a problem imagining things from a male point of view because EVERYTHING is from a male point of view. But when it comes to entertainment/fantasy/sci-fi/whatever writing, a female character is something very few people can do - they can't write women as just people who desire things beyond babies, sexy times and how to please the menz.

Not to say ALL MALE AUTHORS, no not at all, but plenty of them. I say this as someone who has spent their entire lives, since childhood, reading everything I could get my hands on, and have been disappointed SO.MANY.TIMES that when there IS a female character there's is always 1.)Rape 2.)SEXYTIMES/RAPE 3.)Marriage 4.)Marriage and babies 5.)them taking a backseat to the men's role in the story/becoming the sexytimes sidekick who doesn't do much but be the prop and support to the male character (pay attention to that last one). So I have no problem imagining men's stories and perspectives because that's the default, but when it comes to writing women's perspectives I find.... well, let's take some examples, FROM THE NIGHTSIDE.

Hm, better yet let's do a short summary AND examples:

Main character John Taylor is GRIZZLED yo, he's SEEN THINGS and is hardcore, even if no one hires him for his detective skills, and he's basically a loser is this world, IN THE NIGHTSIDE he's like, major business, WORD. He can FIND THINGS. Leggy Blonde Bombshell comes into John's life asking for him to find her runaway daughter, IN THE NIGHTSIDE.

For whatever bizarre reason (sexytimes) this prissy, fussy, stuck up rich bitch decides to tag along, TO THE NIGHTSIDE. Remember what I said about women being props to men's stories? Holy SHIT, this is what Joanna's character was. She is there to be explained at, she's there to comment on the weird-ass shit that goes down, she's there to be saved, and she's there to, I kid you not, simper and go MY HEERROOOOOOO to John.

Lots of Stuff happens, the main bulk of the story is just John and Joanna wandering in and out of trouble, following the white rabbit of Joanna's runaway daughter, finding weird places and having every fucking character be a prop to John's SUPER BADASS-NESS. He's badass because these people ARE TELLING YOU SO, SO IT MUST BE TRUE.

Oh look, ex-psycho girlfriend meets up with John - she's a Blonde, Big-busted Bombshell who looks like dominatrix Barbie. Her and Joanna fight for John because that's what chicks do - cat fight over the menz.

How BADASS is John? HE'S SO BADASS HE ENDED THE WORLD. Because REASONS!!! But it's okay, because that was a different reality so he just hops back onto another reality where it never happened, IN THE NIGHTSIDE.

The ending felt... tacked on, because all of a sudden it's like HA HA FOOLED YOU, JOANNA WASN'T REAL ALL ALONG AND NOW THE HOUSE IS GOING TO EAT YOU. But John's BADASS, so he wins. The end.

All right look, this story has been done before. Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman kicks the shit out of this book and has better female characters, to boot. The Dresden Files has done this, and while I can't stand that series either IT'S BEEN DONE BEFORE so FROM THE NIGHTSIDE feels like a knock off of these two books.

This is a guy book, and what I mean by that is it's basically like walking through a 14 year old boy's wet dream of masculinity - BADASS MEN whom everybody cowers in fear of his BADASS-NESS. Huge titted blonde chicks who throw themselves at you because you're BADASS and SEXY. The world literally TREMBLES at your power, bla bla bla - immature fluff bullshit that I've seen plenty of times before. Basically I feel like the author was projecting his fantasies onto these characters and this world and while it works for some people, it did NOT, however, work for me.

Not to mention, was is really necessary to add 'IN THE NIGHTSIDE' in nearly EVERY GODDAMNED PARAGRAPH!?! I got it the first thirty times, THANK YOU.

Monday, February 9, 2015

The 100 Season Two Episode Ten Recap

The 100 Season Two Episode Ten: Survival of the Fittest

I am naming this episode, here and now, the most ludicrous of all the episodes yet aired. Therefore, this recap is going to have a slightly sarcastic edge to it because it has officially broken the barrier of suspended disbelief for the sake of enjoying an entertaining television show.

Okay, deep breath, let's get this over with and pray the next episode isn't as horrendous. The Grounders and the Skypeople (Teens? Arc-ers? Whatever you want to call them) have more or less sealed a very uncomfortable truce and it's time to start the offence against Mt. Weather who is plotting on using the 48 as their personal cleansing system through admissible and hilariously wrong 'science'. They're EVIL, okay? Just go with it.

Bel and McAbs are running through the forest on their way to infiltrate Mt. Weather, presumably using Lincoln's connection with his man-flesh eatin' buddies of old, the Reavers. Apparently they're so whacked out on drugs they won't even question where the hell he's been this entire time. Remember this little tidbit for later please.

I...don't understand the beginning of this episode. Lickety Abs slaughters a deer, smears the blood on his face and gets his Reaver/Grounder mojo going (I guess?) while Bel decides it's time for Manly Talk and says how good Lincoln's been for Octavia and can I please rip my fucking hair out because OH MY FUCKING GOD WHATTHEEVERLOVINGHELL (^(*)^&$W#$@#@J WETOITU()#$TH()IOWGQHWEGHIOHIOGWU()U*()@#()%@(#%

Ok. Keyboard rage is done.

Please see my thoughts on Lincoln's and Octavia's 'relationship' here while I try to stave off a rage stroke. Then we get a weird ass story from Lincoln that makes NO CONTEXTUAL SENSE about him killing a sky person because his father made him and bla bla bla I stopped paying attention.

Knock, knock - your friendly Grounder neighbors are here with all the charm of a rabid badger intent on eating your leg. Apparently they're going to...train? Even though the first thing they do is start a fight with the Hyena, blaming HIM now because he didn't throw himself on Finn's gun? So the Hyena throws a punch, gets punished for it and the Evil Overlord just shakes his head and goes, 'sooo, what happens after (and if) we win? They go back to killing us?' Good point.

Meanwhile Blondie is trying to hatch plans to take Mt. Weather but it isn't going so well because well... Grounders are dicks. Straight up, yo. How the hell did they even survive as a society when they are so goddamned ANGRY ALL THE TIME and teetering on the brink of hysterical homicidal rage and knee-jerk reactions of DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!!!!!?

Half the group ain't even listening because they're pissed about Blondie killing off a bunch of Grounders (who were intent, if you recall, on complete genocide of teenaged children who have done them no harm and decided to harpoon one because REASONS) so the talk isn't so much as 'hey, how can we get inside and lower their defenses' so much as DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE YOU BITCH!!!!

Not productive.

Nobody's buying the idea of Bel and Abs lowering the defenses from the inside and seem very fond of the idea of throwing themselves fruitlessly against a brick wall because RARR DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!!!! and nobody is getting anywhere. What's the logical thing to do? Why, Blondie will take a walk. Alone. In the woods. After McSociopath threatened to personally disembowel her. Seems legit.

But what's that! A snap of a twig and McSociopath appears! With rage and a bow and arrow! To no one's shocking surprise he tries to kill Blondie who dashes off into the woods. After a vigorous and brisk jog and some dodging of arrows Blondie stumbles upon her Chief of Guard and OH DEAR LORD NO, WHAT HAPPENED TO HER ARM and she's dead.

This is the stuff horrible B horror movies are made of.

Back at 'training' things are...well.. weird. And stupid. Yes, stupid. *sigh* I wouldn't call it training so much as beating the snot out of eachother to see who will be standing at the end of the day. Which doesn't teach anybody anything. Why are the Arc-ers wasting ammo? Do they have a bullet maker on board? Do they have a miraculous way of resupplying bullets they are going to desperately need in a time of war? Oh, I know! Let's offer to give the Grounders a loaded weapon with no training and see what happens!!

Except... not, because the scary-ass lady commander rips her warriors a new one and tells Idiot Overlord they are just FINE, thank you, depending on primitive stones and knives against advanced technology because didn't you know? You bring a knife to a gun fight, silly!

Here Octavia gets to get her Grounder-knowledge on and explain.... oh dear GOD, what? That the Grounders have a superstition that if one of them picks up a gun it will... destroy their civilization or some bullshit. What....just... whaaaaaatt??? Yaaay for mind mindbogglingly stupid superstitions that are almost as good as 'bathing will invite evil spirits in so don't ever get near a bar of soap'.

Let's check in on Blondie. Queenie (somehow) catches up just in time to hock a knife at McSociopath. Blondie blames him for ripping off her Chief of Staff's arm but he says that wasn't him. SO WHO WAS IT. Cue the roar that shakes the forest. WHAT STALKS THEM IN THE DEEP DARK FOREST? Better run, kiddies. Queenie cuts the dudes tendons and allows him to be sacrificed.

So instead of running to safety the little group runs to... whatever is following them feeding grounds. Because REASONS of DRAMA AND HIGH TENSION.

It's a gorilla. A mutant gorilla? Even though I thought gorilla's not only do NOT exist in North America but were vegetarians but what the hell, we're not dealing with ANY realistic expectations in this episode soooo... mutant gorilla. Okay.

Whoops. There's one red shirt down - now it's just Blondie and Queenie.

Blondie shoots it with her tiny, tiny handgun and somehow kills it (even though it's probably five hundred pounds and in reality being shot by a tiny handgun would only make it itchy and enraged but again, ENTERTAINMENT) but whoops, no, it's playing dead. Let's see what the Evil Overlord is up to.

He's having a heart to heart with the Hyena, who is acting as a guide to take him to his son's grave (remember whatshisface from season one who got stabbed by a 12 year old girl?). Seems like a good time to play the blame game and let's just say everbody sucks in some way in this show.

'Training' stops at night and Octavia just wants to join the cool kids. So badly, it seems, that she's willing pick a fight with the Grounders to 'prove herself'. Yes. This tiny angry girl who is 90 pounds wet is going to take on a trained Grounder warrior. Points for trying but she gets the shit kicked out of her. Her willingness impresses Grounder Co-Leader, I guess, and she says she will train Octavia in the ways of the Warrior.

Now we find out what Evil Overlord is up to. Remember his Crazy Times from a couple of episodes back, with his dead son talking to him and all? Well, apparently it's been leading up to him becoming a crazy cult leader.

He DEFINITELY has the crazy eyes going on and sucks in the Hyena with his hypnotic 'let's abandon everyone and march into the extremely hostile new world because if it isn't our time to die, then we're not going to die HA HA HA' and Hyena actually goes with it. They are SO going to die.

Blondie and Queenie have squishy moments. They seriously just need to make out already.

Blondie tricks the wee beasty and gets a glorious idea which is basically the same idea she had at the beginning - let Bel commit Intrigue on the Mt. Weather inside, to let the Alliance take them from the outside.

That brings us to Bel and McAbs. Remember the whole 'Reavers won't remember me' thing from the beginning? Well for reasons of DRAMA Lincoln goes all smouldery and is all I REMEMBER EVERYTHING. Bel is now mostly naked and awaiting judgement (and am I the only one who finds it HILARIOUS that Grounders apparently wear boxers?) but OH NO - to keep up the act and get on the inside Lincoln must allow himself to fall down the rabbit hole of Reaver Craziness again. Poor Lincoln, just when he thought he kicked the habit.

and away goes Bellamy for...er, harvesting. That should make some interesting fanfiction. and THAT ladies and gentleman, was possibly the worst episode to date.

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Er

Don't know if a book review will make it up today; I have to de-install a gallery and paint the walls. Maybe tonight or tomorrow

Edit: aand mild food poisoning. Friday?

Monday, February 2, 2015

The 100 Season Two Episode 9 Recap

The 100 Season Two Episode 9: Remember Me

So, Finn's dead and everybody is upset and a fragile alliance is in the balance. Blondie has regrets.

And a possible mental breakdown. But she gets about three minutes of mourning before it's back to business again. Queenie is more or less satisfied with the outcome being - 'What you've done will haunt you for the rest of your life' sooo WOO HOO lifetime mental trauma, thumbs up!! Queenie's job of sowing destruction and unhappiness all around is done. and remember folks, she's the KIND Grounder...

Let us take a moment please to acknowledge of fiercely fucking awesome character that Blondie is; she just killed her love interest with her own bare hands, she's sealed an alliance arrangement to free the rest of her friends, she's basically the Arc's default Winged Defender of Badass Awesomeness and now she's gone off to take Finn's body to be burned with the people he's massacred.

Raven is unhappy.

I wasn't kidding about the mental breakdown becauuuusssee BWUHH!??

Finn's body opens it's eyes and stares accusedly at Blondie as he's toted away, and she doesn't flip the hell out like I would and start flailing and screaming. Er, he IS dead right??

Meanwhile at Mt. Weather....

Team 48 Oceans Eleven comes up with a plan to hijack Mt. Weather's radio system and redshirt girl is still missing, causing much worry amongst the only four who apparently represent the 48. (Like, seriously, WHERE ARE THE REST OF YOU?!? How can you escape with 48 people when I assume they are scattered everywhere - that's a HUGE number to break out of what's basically an underground bunker...)

Finn continues to stalk Blondie apparition-style and Bel puts forth the idea of his infiltrating Mt. Weather to give them a better advantage. With Finn's body freshly in her mind Blondie goes NO, I'M NOT LOSING YOU TOO and shuts him down.

Grounders and Arc-ers, camping together... let's hope nobody gets stabby feelings during the night. Doc Mama and Idiot Overlord sit down for a chat about the recently imprisoned Original Evil Overlord and Doc Mama says, 'I don't know, maybe we should shock-lash him//snark//' OHHH SNAP, TAKE THAT IDIOT OVERLORD.

McAbs is feeling the backlash of 'betraying' his people (which, um, how..when did that happen? I mean, he was the first to take a step towards peace between the two, which AGAIN, was the Grounders fault by harpooning Jasper for REASONS, but why are they angry at him again? It...doesn't make sense. The Grounders don't make sense... this entire episode is on the thin line of WTF and being plot-less)

But he chose Octavia over his people and this seems like an appropriate time to roll around on the ground making out. In the open. With both camps watching.

So the two allianced teams make it back to the Grounder Camp Ground and the people are less than happy to see them. Everybody is screaming, KILL THE SKY PEOPLE and Grounder justice is harsh. Queenie has her second beat the crap out of a protester within an inch of his life and this is a good time to ask the question; HOW DO THE GROUNDERS EVEN FUNCTION AS A SOCIETY?? It seems like the writers were thinking of Sparta when they wrote the Grounders but like... SERIOUSLY when death is the repercussion for EVERYTHING how do you not collapse into a ball of chaos, hysteria and blood?? Forgot to put the laundry out to dry DEATH OF A THOUSAND CUTS FOR YOUUUU!!!

Not to mention Blondie has recently killed, like, a couple hundred of their warriors at the end of the first season so aren't they down like A LOT of warriors? How freaking big is this village?? If you had THAT many warriors taking down the Teens should have been really easy.

Mt. Weather is spying on them, getting paranoid; 'nawww, they couldn't be alliancing could they? Maybe we should roll out the fog again'

I actually really like that in the absence of Blondie and/or Bellamy the leadership role falls to Jasper and Engineering Kid who do a pretty good job of it - Engineering Kid especially has the smarts to hack into Mt. Weathers system and send out an S.O.S. but first they have to find a way to hack into it.

Dearly Beloved, we gather here today to have a very uncomfortable ceremony to seal the alliance between a group of (mostly) children and homicidal warriors. Blondie and Queenie are hitting it off, exchanging tips on how to become soulless monsters who have no problem murdering everything that comes across their path. See, this here? Is how the crazy is born - saying 'LOVE IS WEAAAAKKKK' is bull. But Blondie is in a bad place at the moment, and is still being haunted by Finn, so I imagine that she clings to anything that will help her numb the pain.

We have the Most Awkward Thanksgiving EVER and predictably someone has poisoned the waterhole, which sends the Grounders into a tizzy, WHICH THEN pisses off Queenie who is after, you guess it, more blood.

They finger Raven as the perpetrator and prepare her for the Thousand Cuts torture (they REALLY LIKE torture) and Blondie falls further into despair. Nothing can go right, it seems.

Oceans Eleven is Oceans Not Happening so Engineering Kid goes solo to infiltrate command base of Mt. Weather. He's actually doing a really decent job of it but security smells something fishy and downs Engineering Kid like a lion on a gazelle. Oh crap, poor Monty.

Raven is tortured and Finn's ghost is surprisingly helpful. Blondie proves their innocence, Queenie's Second in command is a douche and he trades places with Raven. We further see how fucked up a society this is as her Second encourages her to stab him dead. DON'T BE WEAK, MMKAY??!

Also, considering the recent depletion of warriors in Grounder society, and the fact THEY ARE GOING TO WAR SOON, is it such a wise idea to willy nilly slaughter experienced warriors because they got a little intrigue-stupid?

Well, Blondie has learned her lesson. It's better to be a cold, soulless shell of a human being who doesn't mind torture, slaughter and general crimes against humanity rather than being weak and loving people. She sends Bellamy out to infiltrate Mt. Weather and if he dies, oh well.

She joined the ranks of Cold Hard Bitch Club, and it's mighty aggravating because while to be a general in a war you have to steel yourself against some emotion and make sacrifices there is such a thing as too much sacrifice and pragmatism.

But what happened to Engineering Kid??

NOOO! MONTY!!! You're a lab rat!! But we found out what happened to Redshirt Girl - she's on the cage on top of Monty, within a room of 48 cages made specially for our troubled teens. You better hurry up, Blondie.