Monday, December 22, 2014

The 100 Season Two Episode Three: Reapercussions

Crap, So I totally apologize for being a giant lazy butt and not getting to the second episode before it was pulled on both Hulu and the CW. We’re not going to have a second episode recap unless I can find it for free somewhere on the internet.

So with a slight gap in between we shall move onto episode three.

To remind everyone: The world has ended and the fate of humanity is (mostly) in the hands of teenagers. A small portion of our Teens have been captures and brought to Weather Mountain to participate in a Normal Rockwell lookalike contest.

Blondie doesn’t buy it.

Finn was taken, now he’s rescued, Bellamy, Finn and the Hyena (and a couple of others) team up to go and find their friends, breaking out of the ‘safety’ of the Arc Town with the help of Doctor Mama. Who also gives them guns.

I think the second episode ends with Blondie finding the dark underbelly of the Normal Rockwell groupies; in this case its human experimentation. Guess who she finds locked up in a cage? Perpetually Perturbed who is mighty eager to get out.

Okay, Episode Three: Reapercussions.

People in a cage, and people hanging upside down with medical… things all around. That doesn’t seem to bode well. Clarke is going to get Perpetually out (even though they’ve constantly tried to kill one another in the past, I’m sure nothing will go wrong with that).

So either the plot is weak or the padlocked cage is, because Blondie manages to manhandle the lock open by twisting it with a pipe and it just… pops off without a lot of effort. I think whoever bought that lock should get a refund.

Whoa, its too early to celebrate; one of the scientists waltzes in and Blondie scrambles into Perpetual’s cage and prays the doctor doesn’t notice the (not even broken) lock on the ground. She doesn’t.

They make a run for it.

And are dropped down the corpse shoot into some tunnels where apparently the Reapers congregate to feast? What’s with that? Are the Norma Rockwell groupies keeping Reapers as pets?

And here they come! Good times and cannibalism for everyone. Our Dynamic Duo leap into an empty mining cart and play dead, hoping that by looking really unappetizing the Reapers won’t gnaw on their entrails.

It. Kind of works?

Instead the Reapers toss in some more mostly dead bodies and cart off our Dynamic Duo to their supposed doom.

The Arc survivors are surviving and rebuilding a city on the ground while the newly appointed Evil Overlord is unhappy with the Doctor Mama’s involvement with the freeing of those rascally teenagers.

Speaking of which; Finn, Bel, the Hyena and some other kids are on the hunt for Clarke and the rest, not knowing it was actually the freaky Normal Rockwell groupies of Weather Mountain that have taken them.

And whoops, Octavia is in trouble (and is sans McPecs, so I assume something terrible happened to him?) so that must mean its Tuesday.

Jasper is easy prey for cultists; all you gotta do is fling one of their nubile teenage girls at him and feed him cake and he’s taken into the fold.

Engineer kid is concerned he hasn’t seen Clarke in a long time and Jasper is all ‘but CAKE and BOOBIES!’ And he’s out.

Our Dynamic Duo wait until the Reapers are good and feasting and not paying attention before they hop the cart and get the hell out of there, but not before Perpetually throws a hissy fit about ‘working alone’ or some stupid shit because YEAH, going off on your own in abandoned tunnels with cannibals looking to gnaw on your leg bone is TOTES a good idea.

Finn, Bellamy and Co. decide the best way to find out what happened is to kidnap a grounder and torture information out of him.

Also, meanwhile, the Arc community has caught their own Grounder as well.

Strangely enough Bel and Co. are actually successful in capturing a grounder without too much fuss. It’s like a 100 first; a plan that actually goes as planned.

Octavia stalks some Grounders.

The Dynamic Duo finally split up, leaving Clarke alone, freaked out and trying to find a way out inside the vast tunnel network of Weather Mountain. Apparently Perpetually Perturbed is not a team player.

Ah ha, Octavia is now teaming up with Grounders to try and rescue…McHottypants? So I guess in the last episode he was taken or something.

Aaand Blondie trips up and is cornered by cannibals. Then is taken by Mount Weather personnel like some weird game of ‘who gets to take Clarke now?’. Instead of being eaten she’ll just get experimented on.

Back at the Arc the Old Ways are hard to let go of, apparently, the security officer chief is demanding they give the Doctor Mama ten lashes with the electro-whatsit, for letting the teens go and giving them weapons.

And like a dumbass Evil Overlord agrees because ORDER and SANCTITY or some bullshit. Soooo…. They’re going to torture their only competent doctor in the entire camp. Like I said. DUMBASSES.

In a parallel to this activity Bel and Co. are torturing their own captive to find the whereabouts of Clarke and everyone else, even though we, the audience, know the grounders have nothing to do with it.

Old One Eye ain’t dumb. They aren’t going to stop until he tells them SOMETHING so he lies about their friends. And Finn goes a little postal. With a gun. Mr. Greenpeace has been unhinged since the last time we saw him apparently. Maybe the Grounders beat him a little too hard on the head.

And we flash back to Octavia’s little coup with the Grounders which also goes swimmingly well; they free their captured comrades, Octavia searches for McHotMuffins in vain and howls at the moon. Like, ferserious, she lets out this horrible scream that echoes into the commercials. Where is Lincoln?

Back at the Norman Rockwell Groupie center Jasper’s girlfriend lies through her teeth about Clarke and says, ‘Oh, I’m so sorry but Clarke went batshit crazy and we had to put her in the psyche ward. Because. CRAZY, you know, chicks be crazy?’

And Jasper doesn’t even question it. I’m starting to get a bad feeling about him.

So where is Blondie, really? About to be taken into the lab. Since she knows the dark truth about Mount Weather, she’s about to become a lab experiment. Until!

With a warrior like screech in comes Perpetually!! The Dynamic Duo is back and makes another run for it!

Must run faster.

FREEEEEDOM!

Of a watery sort.

Back at Arc Town the Evil Overlord is feeling guilty about beating the only doctor in the community. Badass Doctor Mama gives him a LOOK and says point blank, ‘look, bitch, you can beat me but I’m still going to break rules if I have to’.

HELL YEAH.

And now I am officially changing Evil Overlord to Idiot Overlord because DAMN, are you dumb.

Huurrr, derp, I know that, but I tortured you anyway.

And he wants to make ‘diplomatic’ contact with the Grounders to negotiate for peace. *GIGGLESNORT* yeaaa, I give that about thirty seconds before someone gets harpooned.

Meanwhile, Clarke has survived her leap of faith and is dragged ashore by Perpetually. They have a brief moment of FRIENDSHIP before Perpetually Perturbed smashes a rock into Blondie’s head and claims her as a hostage.

Whoops.

Back with the Find Blondie Team, Bel wants to take off and find this camp that the Grounder has told them about. This creates an argument with what to do with said Grounder.

Bel doesn’t want to kill him, he says its no better than execution and cold blooded murder with him tied up on a chair and unable to defend himself.

The Hyena argues that if they don’t kill him they are screwed and while they are all arguing we hear one gunshot. The Grounder falls over, very dead and FINN is standing there with the smoking gun.

What the hell is going on with Finn?! When did Bel and Finn switch personalities?

Team Find Blondie moves out.

Let’s end this episode with Octavia, beaten and huddled leaning against a tree trunk. A Grounder stands before her and she says dully, ‘if you’re going to kill me get it over with’.

BUT, instead the Grounders are all like, YOU HAVE FOUGHT WELL, COME WITH US. And she’s like, Cool, okay.

BUT WHERE IS McHOTTYGRIDDLECAKES?? In the worst place one can be, one assumes, caught and being sized up like the grade A piece of meat he is by one of the Mount Weather scientists. Uh oh, he is now up for experimentation by the Norman Rockwell Groupies!!!

3 comments:

  1. This isn't even entertainingly bad anymore.

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  2. yeaaa.... it's kind of a mess. I can almost see the formula; no plot but put everybody into lots of peril and love triangles and BOOM! you have a TV show. Seems to be popular on Tumblr though.

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    1. Well someone did ask for the book of it once at my work. I had to disappoint her by telling her the book only covered ep 1 and thus would not help her confusion any. So someone liked it enough to want the book. I'm still going on the theory that this is all virtual reality and that's why none of the people act like real people in real reality.

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